It's wicked to mock the afflicted

I unconsciously rubbed my freshly shaven head as my mother told me about the affliction of her favourite dog. The poor dumb creature was loosing its pretty black fur in golf divot sized clumps. A solution for her slap headed dog and a unique birthday gift for her came to mind. The mass of wavy five-inch jet hair looked like an animal nested at the bottom of the envelope. I also enclosed a glue stick and a note saying:

DOG PATCH KIT
colour: Midnite Black

INSTRUCTIONS FOR USE:
1)Apply glue stick liberally to affected area.
2)Press product to glue.
3)Leave to set.
4)Trim to desired length.

THANK YOU FOR USING OUR PRODUCT

I sure hope she likes my present. I have a feeling she'll call me immediately after receiving it. :)