Monday, May 15, 2006

A few inconsequential observations

Number 1
Garbage trucks smell the same no matter what side of the ocean you are on. You would think that a country's garbage truck smell would reflect the terroir of the local population's refuse, but every garbage truck I unluckily cross on early morning commutes smell the same. It's a unique smell when, or if you want to, think about it. Maybe garbage trucks in Asian smell different. I don't know. Anyone reading this whose had a whiff of Asia's garbage trucks are encouraged to leave comments.

Number 2
Old ladies are crazy for the little dividers they provide at the grocery checkout conveyer to separate your groceries for them. Even if you both only have one item and they are clearly seperated by a foot of space, the little grey head willgrab a divider to introduce between your stuff and hers. I suggest a number of things once they put the divider down, firstly you pick it up and say, "that won't be necessary". It drives them nuts. You could also just put you one of your items on their side of the divider and then give them a wink when they look at you accusingly. If you don't want a direct confrontation with someone's grandma, just crowd all your purchases against the divider. It makes them nervous and figity. It's cute.

Number 3
Do not go out on the streets of Scotland if one of the following have occurred (heaven forbid both occur on the same day): either the national football team loses a match or the movie 'Braveheart' plays on the television. Both make the natives restless and irritable.

That's all for today.

1 comment:

  1. they played braveheart as the in-flight movie when i flew back from my first and only trip to london. the plane was chock-full of scots, at least as chock-full of scots as i've ever seen a plane. i don't often see scots going abroad for some reason. anyhow, that was a very uncomfortable 2 hours' portion of the flight. hopefully the programming director was at least given a good talking to. that was almost as weird as the two times i've been shown "speed" on a mexican bus, and "top gun" on my very first plane flight, to disneyworld. the frequent planes-exploding noises made my childhood heart awfully nervous.

    i don't recall ever having seen an asian garbage truck, let alone smelled one, although i definitely recall the tedious and thorough separation of garbage required there. not only are plastics separated from papers and collected on separate days, but if you don't scrape all the papers from your plastics, or pry the staples from your papers, the neighborhood busybody will show up at your door. but yeah, it's weird, i never thought about it before, but i never saw a japanese garbage truck. nor one in hong kong, thailand, cambodia, or vietnam, although that seems less weird, as the garbage there may be rather precious to the lower strata of citizenry. perhaps japanese garbage cans are actually garbage-eating robots, who spew their wastes as beautiful hydrangea bushes. i wouldn't be terribly surprised.