It's wicked to mock the afflicted

I don't know what it is about my countenance that inspires these kinds of confessions but they sure make the commute more interesting.

I met an irishman from the same part of Ulster that some of my ancestors fled generations ago. Apprently I am genetically predisposed to horse theivery but that's another story. Me and my companion chatted about ireland and scotland and america. He then asked me if there would be a problem getting into the US with 'multiple firearms offences'. I said the only people who don't have firearm convictions are pinkos and queers and Uncle Sam would consider such charges a mark of honour to any foreigner visiting his shores (unless of course he's darker than a hamburger bun). He seemed relieved at this answer and, before he got off at his stop, he made the sign of the cross over me. Yes. God bless me indeed.